Thursday, June 24, 2010

I'm Back...

Before I go into my "this is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard rant." I wanted to just say hello, sorry I have been gone, but I set out to change a couple of things up in this place. And in true me fashion, I was not surprised when I left for the store to buy a pair of flip flops and came back with a dozen sparkly stilettos. Some may call it obsessive, some compulsive, I call it a itty bitty mid-life hiccup, OK maybe a little more stinky, let's say a burp but a good garlicky burp after eating shrimp scampi with garlic toast.

So that brings me to this article that I found online yesterday, well that is if you go back to the shoes segway, not the garlic burp. Anyhow it states:

High Heels, Flip Flops, And Ballet Flats Are Apparently No-Nos For Pregnant Women

A recent report from BBC News says that expectant mothers need much more support than they're getting from footwear like ballet flats, flip flops, and high heels. The Society of Chiropodists and Podiatrists polled 1,000 pregnant women and found that many regularly wore all three non-supportive styles, despite complaints of swollen ankles (37%), swollen feet (45%) and arch and heel pain (16%) while pregnant. "The society is urging women to wear supportive, wide fitting shoes to minimize discomfort and avoid long-term damage," the BBC report says.

Whuck? Are you kidding me? There are so many things wrong with this statement. First and the most obvious, the only reason someone should be wearing tennis shoes is if they are going to workout, aspire to workout or want someone to think that they have plans to work out sometime during the day.

Now I have only been prego twice- both times in the summer, but I can honestly say that the last thing I would consider wearing was A PAIR Of SOCKS let alone a pair of sneakers. And supportive shoes I don't even know what those are? If you can't wear flats or flops or heels what does that leave? Brown nurse shoes, I mean even if you bedazzle the hell out of them, they are brown fake leather shoes with spongy heels. And just how is one to tie these supportive shoes with a NBA sized basketball protruding out of ones stomach? My two cents, call it quits, girlfriend, if you have to ask assistance from the lady with the helmet hair and lavendar sensible sweater set in Payless during the annual BOGO sale to assist you as you force your swollen elephant ankle in a pair of "supportive shoes."

So I say we definitely discard this information as false and you pregnant women rock out your flip flops and your stilettos. Because a failed arch is much better than looking like a beached whale in tight sneakers with ultra large cankles hanging over your constricted socks, now red faced because the heat is only allowed to escape from your oversized oven is only from your head. Either that or just go barefoot for goodness sake.